FULL DISCLOSURE?

How much is too much and how much is not enough?    Does disclosing all information make us look weak and or does it make us look human and easier to relate too?

This post is probably not going to have any pretty or funny pictures to go with it because I can't find any in my folders that relate to my topic.  Basically I am just purging and getting thoughts off of my chest.

As a parent of teenage children, I find each year brings greater challenges that I am not always sure how to deal with.  The  fact that I am divorced from my children's father also means, in my case, that I don't always have an open line of communication with him to discuss strategy.  We also don't have the same style of parenting either which is an added factor.  My husband has very cut and dry opinions on how to handle situations, but I don't always agree with him either because I am the mama and see and feel things much differently than a step-dad.

So.........I feel very lost sometimes as to where to turn for advice.

I am trying to figure out how much about our lives we should disclose to our children.  Revealing our faults, mistakes and hard times to our children, is it a good idea or not so much?  Does it help our children to open up to us and not hide things from us? 

As much as I love my parents, and KNOW that they love me dearly, I have never had the type of relationship with them where I felt I could be completely open with my feelings and tough times.  I have always been this way with them.  When I became a parent, I made the decision that I was not going to have that type of relationship with my children.  I would do my absolute best to let them know that I am not here to judge them but to love and support them in every aspect of their life.  Not necessarily agree with everything they do, but be willing to listen and be there for them.  I was sure my parents would never understand what I was going through or relate to me because I never heard one story from them about how they got in trouble as a child or ever made a mistake.  As a result, I usually ended up getting myself into worse situations because I didn't have an adult to go to and ask for direction.  My parents would be very hurt to read that this is how I felt/feel, but it is the truth. 

So, as my chilren get older and become young adults, I ask myself, how much do I tell them?  My gut reaction is to just tell every ugly little thing I have done and been through in hopes of keeping them from making the same mistakes.  But does that really work or does that just make me lose all credibility as a parent?  I know my kids need to make their own decisons and their own mistakes, it is the only way to grow and learn.  But it is soooooo hard to sit back and see it happen and know what the outcome is going to be.

I don't want my children to EVER be afraid to come to me with a problem, no matter how BIG or SMALL.  I am hear to listen, try and understand, give my opinion or bite my tongue, suggest direction and point the way.  Whatever is needed from me.  I don't expect perfection because none of us are perfect.  I just want to be the best parent I can be, not the BEST FRIEND for my kids, but the best parent. 

If I never get another comment on this blog, I don't care.  But PLEASE, I am begging you all, PLEASE sign up or do whatever you need to do to be able to leave a comment, and let me know your feelings and thoughts on this subject.  I don't normally ask for help, but I am this time, so please, feel free to tell me what you think.  You don't need to agree with me, I just want to know what other moms and/or dads think.

Have a great Friday and very happy weekend.